HerFancy30thBDAY

noname-2

On December 17, 2016, I turned 30 years old. I have never felt so fulfilled in all of my life. I am a woman who experienced pain, embarrassment, love, loss, death, life, excitement, and accomplishment in my 20’s. I’m excited to close the door to the 20th chapter of my life, and open the door to Chapter 30!

I look forward to seeing my hard work pay off in my 30’s. I’m seeing it now in the first week! I look forward to being more carefree and enjoying every single moment.

I look forward to saying F the stretch marks, and so what if I’m squeezing into my size 6 jeans. Knowing next week, they may be an 8.

I look forward to traveling and seeing the world with my beautiful baby girl!

My 20’s taught me:

1. Strive for Greatness.
2. Stay humble.
3. Give Back.
4. Love yourself.
5. Be relentless about making your dreams a reality.
6. Knowing that what is meant to be will be.
7. Hard work pays off.
8. Be confident.
9. Know your worth.
10. F* your pride.
11. Do what makes you happy.
12. Self-Care is a must.
13. Work-Out.
14. Be kind to others.
15. Allow people to be who they are.
16. Your circle reflects you.
17. Eliminate toxic people from your life.
18. If you focus on you, you won’t see where others are lacking.
19. Have integrity.
20. TRAVEL! – See the world.
21. Use spellcheck.
22. Show appreciation.
23. Be Grateful.
24. Think before you speak.
25. Help heal and not tear down.
26. Write your goals on paper.
27. Be honest and have tact.
28. Privacy is important.
29. Be organized.
30. Slay.

Gratitude is a KEY to Success!

me

“The miracle of gratitude is that it shifts your perception to such an extent that it changes the world you see” – Dr. Robert Holden

 

No Discounts in 2016

c6c13cd40216c78a6c70e03d20dd3b01

Often times with relationships, all relationships including friendships, romantic relationships, and relationships with family, we let other people treat us in a manner that doesn’t make us feel good. We allow them to lie to us (discount), make fools of us (discount), and not be people of their word (discount). When we allow people to treat us in this manner, we feel hurt, we feel unworthy, and we feel insignificant. When we let people do this to us time and time again, we are giving them discounts, which show how we feel about ourselves as oppose to how another person feels about us. When you know your value, you don’t give discounts.

When you think of High-end Luxury brands, you’ll notice that they don’t discount their prices, because they know their worth, and understand that people, who value their product, will pay what is asked. We need to know our worth, and when people don’t value and/or appreciate us, we need to let them go. In life, some people will be leaves, others will be branches, and it’s up to us to figure out who deserves to be permanent fixtures in our lives.

I’m not allowing people to treat me like I’m a fool in 2016, it is true that I don’t have control over their actions, but I do have control over who is a part of my life, and this year I’m moving forward to live Happy, Healthy, and Wealthy. I have no time for people seeking discounts, people who are constantly taking and never giving, people who are not equally yoked, and people that don’t appreciate the value I contribute.

I wish you all a Joyous, Prosperous, and Happy 2016!

Teach.Inspire.Motivate.Empower

Picture from the amazing artist Pienele Chill

The Power of Excellence!

The Power of Excellence

images

Last weekend, I had the pleasure of attending #AACHAC’s Women’s Health Conference! Can I tell you, it was one of my favorite moments of 2015! It started with a great energizing welcome, which led to a series of workshops! I attended a cooking workshop and a financial literacy workshop! In between my workshops, I received a massage and a manicure! It was GREAT! The highlight of my day came when I heard the Amazing Amy Hilliard as the Keynote!

She is the President of Fashion Fair Cosmetics and the Founder of ComfortCakes! She is a Howard University Graduate and a HARVARD MBA! Can you say -AWESOME! She spoke about the principals of Success and her new book TAP Into Your Juice: Find Your Gifts, Lose Your Fears, and Build Your Dreams! What a powerful message!

As I sat and Listened to Amy, I felt empowered to continue to move forward, one thing that she said that really stuck with me and that was that as long as you can look up, you can get up! It is never too late to follow your dreams, it’s never too early to follow your dreams. We have to learn how to walk in our greatness and our purpose in every moment of our life!

2 years ago at this same conference, I felt inspired by Amy’s sister Gloria! Gloria Mayfield Banks, MARY KAY extraordinaire! She was so uplifting, motivating, inspiring, empowering, and EXCELLENT! These are two blood sisters, who both went to Howard University for Undergrad, and Harvard Business School for professional degrees! One sister became a Marketing Expert, and the Other a Sales Expert, and the both are examples of Excellence! I admire them for being my career inspiration, my mentors in my head, and everything that I hope to be! #BlackGirlMagic

gloria-mayfield-banks-sm

I got 99 problems, but a BARBER ain’t one!

I got 99 problems, but a BARBER ain’t one!
So…..I was referred to a barber by a friend of mine. He said “dude is a cat*, but he’ll cut you right”. I started laughing and said ok, I’ll try him out.

Snapchat--211296632172741196-1
When I arrived at the location, I walked into a beauty shop first, and his barbering area was in the rear. Being in an environment that had an equal amount of men and women made me feel a little more at ease. He was running late and had people waiting, so I made a mental note that he may have an issue with being on time. He was very personable and asked me a lot of questions that made me feel relaxed, and he put the cape around me and went to work. I’m sitting there with a few butterflies in my stomach as my hair hit the floor, but excited to see the outcome. As I turned around and faced the mirror, I was Shocked. It was low…. Real low… I didn’t know if I liked it or not, but I knew he gave me a great cut. It was feminine, even, and cut well. After leaving the shop, I went to my sister, and she dyed it brown (I had too many natural highlights aka grey hairs), and after it was dyed, I fell in love with my hair. I felt empowered! Cinderella had finally found her slipper.

20150906_192238

It can be difficult being a woman with short hair, and to not have people cut it properly can really feel devastating. It messes with your self-esteem.
Since my first haircut, I’ve gone back on three separate occasions. Honestly he is the best barber, but boy can he tell a story, and he’s never on time, but hey, I look great!

20151017_161826

Cat* – a person who is always talking, but never says anything with substance. Not trustworthy.

LIVE YOUR LEGEND

LIVE YOUR LEGEND

I was home this weekend and decided to watch a few TED TALKS that my friend recommended. OMG, I felt so intrigued by the idea of LIVING YOUR LEGEND! As humans, we are often faced with decisions that will change our life, and we usually choose what is safe vs. what we truly desire. We choose what is safe because we don’t feel good enough to have what we really want. We let our feelings of inadequacy and insecurity prevent us from following our dreams and desires. Living Your Legend is about finding your passion and unapologetically going after what you want and the life you want.

This came to me at a perfect time in my life. I’m in a place of transition and right now I’m sitting in a parking lot trying to figure out what path I want to take. I often feel beaten up, discouraged, inadequate, and fearful, because I’ve faced rejection so many times. After while you start to believe that you’ll never have what you desire, because it’s so hard to attain. I’ve realized that I have to encourage myself! I have to know that what is meant for me is for me and if I don’t get what think I want, it may be for the best.

I wish all of you a happy and productive week and remember to LIVE YOUR LEGEND!

WING TIP for a haircut!

imgres

My handsome, younger co-worker came into the office on a Friday and said he was going to get his haircut downstairs, and I was shocked. I’m like where? At Wingtip? He laughed and said yes! He said that their barber does a great job and extended a discount to him. I said oh, wow, that’s wassup. So I sashayed my way down there and asked the barber if he could squeeze me in. He said “of course”. The facility is very fancy, the ambiance is amazing, and there is only one person in the space at a time! The barber is handsome and personable. We talked the entire time, laughing and talking like we’d known each other for years! He made me feel very comfortable and gave me a run-down of his experience. I was impressed with his resume and proud of his accomplishments though we’d just met.

The shop is downstairs from my office, and I thought I had finally found my barber… Until I was done getting my haircut and looked in the mirror. I thought to myself why didn’t he line up the sides of my hair. From the front you can’t even tell, I had had a haircut. The cut itself was even, and the back was perfect. The only thing is, when I look in the mirror, I see the front, and if that is not cute, then we have a problem.

After experiencing this, I thought to myself, maybe I should give him a second chance. With all of my barbering experiences, I’ve only got cut by each barber 1 time. I’ve never given them an opportunity to redeem themselves or to make a better impression, I always axe them after my first encounter. I also thought that maybe I should have better direction. Maybe my pictures aren’t clear enough, maybe it’s me.
Until I found Jay!

Liebster

OMG…..This is such an honor! I was nominated for a Liebster by the amazing @solarflowerchild! I did not have a clue what this was until I saw her post.

These awards only have a few rules: 

  1. Thank the blogger who nominated you with a link back to his/her blog
  2. Answer the questions asked by the nominator
  3. Nominate bloggers with under 500 followers
  4. Create 10 questions for the nominees to answer.

Who do you look up to most/ who is your role model?

I look up to so many different people, but my role model would be Sheila E. Lewis! She is an African American Entrepreneur, a marketer by trade. She follows her dreams and lives fearlessly. She does this all in Stilettos! She is a fabulous leader and runs a very successful firm. I want to be like her when I grow up! Check out Ashton212.com, to learn more about her.

Number one place you’ve always wanted to travel to or have traveled to?  Why is it number one?

The number one place I want to travel to is Ghana. Being a decedent of African’s who were a part of the Trans-Atlantic slave trade, and having my culture and heritage stolen from me, I’ve longed to have a link to my original ancestors. From my research, I’ve found that most African’s who were enslaved are originally from the Western Coast of Africa, and most went through the doors of no return in Ghana. I hope that touching this soil brings be closer to my finding myself.

What is one of the most embarrassing things you have ever done?

One of the most embarrassing things I’ve ever done was fall down the stairs at Kaiser after a doctor’s appointment. I was looking at my phone as I was walking down the stairs, and completely missed a step and tumbled down quite a few stairs. Not to mention the fall was loud.

What is your favorite color?  How does it describe you?

My favorite color is Purple! Purple is associated with royalty, of which describes my ancestors. Purple symbolizes power, nobility, luxury, and ambition. These are all attributes that describe me.

Favorite movie of all time?

My favorite movie of all time is Crooklyn, by Spike Lee. I could watch this movie over and over again.

List five things you would put on your bucket list (So I can add them to mine :] )

  • Sky Diving
  • Starting my own business
  • Going Natural (done)
  • Going white water rafting (done)
  • Take a road trip across the country

Favorite music artist?

Beyonce

What would you tell your 13-year-old self?  Why?

I would tell by 13-year-old self that you’re good enough, smart enough, pretty enough. You are enough just as you are, and don’t let anyone define your life. Do what you want to do and be confident in your decisions. I think these are important things to hear as a child, because I didn’t pursue a lot of things that I wanted to do at a young age, because of my fear of failure and rejection.

If you could relive one moment in your life what would it be?  Why?

If I could relive one moment in my life if would be the moment I selected a college because I should have followed my heart.

Do you have any regrets in your life, if so list one.  Explain why you regret it.  If not, explain why you have no regrets.

Not in a place to share, but thank you for asking!

Thank you @SolarFlowerChild for nominating me. This was fun and really made me reflect on my life and my decisions. I nominate

  1. @Sister Shabazz

2. @VanessaMichelle

3. @BareLEEthere 

4. @TooMuchMouth

5. @PiecesofNiaG

6. @CatDinas

My Questions:

  1. What are you most passionate about?
  2. Are you Natural or Straight? and Why?
  3. Who is your favorite Celebrity and why?
  4. How would you spend a “lazy” day?
  5. What is your favorite quote?
  6. If you could quit your job and do anything what would it be?
  7. Dinner and a movie or Drinks and dancing?
  8. If you could change anything about your life, what would it be? Why?
  9. What is your middle name?
  10. If you could have selected your own name what would it have been?

Brunching in the Bay: San Leandro Edition, Paradiso

10171044_722634151103813_4541959835062470124_n

On Sunday of this past week, I had the pleasure of having brunch with two really amazing women! Both of whom inspire me! We decided to have brunch at one of our favorite spots, PARADISO, and they NEVER disappoint. The service was A-1, the food was great, and the overall experience was great!

I arrived first and walked-in to a host with a big smile and welcoming attitude. I let her know, we would be a party of 3 and what table we preferred. She reserved our table, and I went outside to soak up the sun.

After my girl C-C arrived, we went and sat down and began to chat and wait for the third member of our party. As soon as we got comfortable the waitress was there asking us for our drink order, we ordered tea, she brought the tea and water.

After the third member of our party arrived, we ordered our brunch and an appetizer to share. For our appetizer we shared the DUNGENSS CRAB & AVOCADO, it is the best thing on EARTH. The flavors just dance in your mouth, it’s truly superb. Anyone who has ever been to Paradiso has tried this dish. It is unique to their restaurant and its fresh and healthy.

My main course was the DUNGENESS CRAB OMELET with egg whites, sub the potatoes for fruit. I enjoyed my entree, but it was not as flavorful as the appetizer.

We sat, talked, laughed, sipped, bounced business ideas off of each other, gave relationship advice, and enjoyed our time with each other. I appreciate having genuine relationships with intelligent, ambitious, people who like to have fun with its time, and get stuff done when its time. I’m very grateful that the universe has brought these two into my life.